I thought in order to talk about the movie, I have to know about the show, right? (NC's smile drops as the Digimon theme plays with clips of the movie) NC: Well, if that's the way it has to be. You need to have grown up with it, seen a good majority of the episodes, have a good connection to the fan community that you obviously do not have, so, yeah, this is far out of your league even with my help. JO: Oh, Critic! You can't come into a show like Digimon and expect to properly represent it. NC: I'm doing Digimon! Do you want to help or not? JO: Uh, yeah! I thought that was for AngryJoe, actually. NC: You see that incredibly expensive spotlight being pointed in the sky? (Phone rings with the song "Melissa" by Porno Graffiti) Hello? (Cut to JesuOtaku combing her Kyubei doll) Joe (vo): I deserve a Joe signal, Critic! Joe: Not until I get a Joe signal in the sky! Critic's phone suddenly rings)Īngry Joe: Are we invading another micronation? (He tries one more time with the now taped up remote and the spotlight is now successfully shining in the night sky. NC: Goddamn it, it's during the day! TAP-DANCING CRAP! (he throws the remote onto the ground, breaking it) ![]() NC: Goddamit, there's no clouds out! When the hell would that ever happen? (We then hear the theme from Batman (1989) begin as the Critic presses a remote control to activate a spotlight that says "JO" on it and looks to the side) ![]() ![]() (Shows the email as he reads it with a normal voice) "Do Digimon! Do Digimon! *waves arms in girly fashion and squeaks in high pitch pussy voice." What am I supposed to say about a show that I don't know slash care anything about, and yet everybody is asking me to do it? There's only one person who can help me out with this. And yet SO many people are like "Oh, do Digimon! Oh, do Digimon!" No seriously. I-I was in college for God's sake! I didn't even watch Pokemon! "Oh Pikachu, Pikachu!" FUCK THAT SHIT!. NC: What's with you people? I didn't watch Digimon growing up. He then sits back in his chair and addresses the audience.) (The Critic is grumpily typing at his computer when he finds several emails of fans requesting him to review Digimon, which he then groans at and drags to his "Digimon Requests" file, which are up to 1,145. NOTICE: This transcript was done before JesuOtaku's transition from female to male.
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